Friday, October 21, 2011

An Absent Mind Is....

Afternoon Readers,

     Yesterday I spent an hour looking for my cell phone. If I didn't find it, I wouldn't have it for when no one called, like usual. If I missed all my non-existent calls, how was I going to not talk to all the people who were trying to not call me about things that didn't concern me at all? After going through all the drawers, the refrigerator and propping-up the dog, I still hadn't found it. I turned to the babies. "Did you eat it?" I put my ear to Sundance's belly to see if I could hear a dial tone. Nothing. It wasn't until I went for my third cookie of the day, that I found it sitting next to the bread. I sighed an ate an Oreo. It had happened again...

     For several weeks now, I've been noticing a strange phenomena. I'll be in the middle of doing something like dusting my credit cards, when I'll get distracted, wander off and forget what I was doing, leaving the previous task completely unfinished.

     This morning, I drank my usual cup of coffee and frowned at the dog. "This tastes like gravel. Did you try and brew it again?" I took his slamming the door as a no, and, upon further inspection, I'd forgotten to actually brew the coffee and just finished a mug full of grounds. While I flossed, I remembered I'd seen a water spot on the front door and gotten distracted on my way to the coffee pot...

     That night, at dinner, Husband made a huge to-do about something. He pointed at his plate. "I can't eat this."

     "Why not? You love steak."

     "It's not cooked. ....Wait, I thought it was chicken."

     "Can you eat it anyway? I got busy pulling the babies out of the dishwasher and forgot. You need to make a choice, the safety of your children or food poisoning. Answer carefully, they're both listening."

     "That shouldn't be a choice."

     "And rainbows are made for wishing. Look, I don't make the rules."

     It's only getting worse, day by day. I've tried to pay the water bill with a grocery list, twice. And the neighbors just confirmed I've been walking around with one pant leg on and one off because I can't seem to remember what I was doing before I started brushing the mirror and shining my teeth. Some people tell me this is called "mom brain", but I think rooms just have more shiny objects than they used to.

If I remember to post this, I'll be pretty excited. I'll do that right after I look for my phone. I think someone wasn't supposed to call me this afternoon...

So tell me, are you forgetful?

Until Next Time, Readers!

13 comments:

  1. YOU ARE JUST TOO FUNNY!
    My face actually hurts from smiling during this and, thanks to your posts, I no long have to go to the gym to do my ab workouts. You. Are. Amazing. DONE.
    And this is basically my life:
    .
    .
    .
    .(indicates the time I spent on the internet forgetting what I was doing but suddenly remembering and rushing back with the link I had been searching for)
    http://themetapicture.com/this-happens-way-too-often/

    You're so amazing. Thanks for being funny.

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  2. I must be tired from today because I'm still trying to wrap my head around you and your cell phone habits from the first sentence.

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  3. My Doctor told me it was old age and to learn to live with it.

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  4. Here I am, Paige--a follower! (I still couldn't find a follow button, except for twitter. I typed paigekellerman.com into ADD on the Blogger Dashboard & it worked!)

    You were EXTRA funny today, describing MY life to everyone! Oh, & don't worry about finding your phone. I was the one who wasn't supposed to call you--I think.

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  5. I lose anything and everything. I could lose the remote, my phone, and my keys about 5 times a day. It's called having a million things to do and your brain can't retain placing something somewhere. Sigh...

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  6. Oh sweetie, you are so funny. I lose things and forget things, but I try very hard not to because I freak out when something is missing. I'm still upset because last night I thought of a post I wanted to write and I forgot what it was on my way to get a pen. Life is hard.

    Love,
    Lola

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  7. I used to 'loose' my cell phone all the time and would search and search until finally I had to tell the person that I was talking to (via my cell phone) that I was sorry that I wasn't paying much attention because I was madly trying to find my phone...at this point I would feel like an idiot and the person I was talking too would laugh hysterically at me.
    I'm not a mom so I can't have mom brain. I can't imagine drinking coffee grounds though (maybe that's why we have to get instant though...)

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  8. Yep you have kids. Get used to it. lol If I could remember where I put my hair brush I'd brush my hair and not look like the wild woman from Borneo. Although that works out because people don't mess with me. Good times. Write everything of importance down then put the list on the fridge. High so the babies won't eat it. Much simpler that way. If they do manage to snag it just wait a day. It will be in their diapers and you can piece it back together.

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  9. So here I am all proud of myself sending people over to follow you and as I looked through your followers to see if I was on there I realized I forgot to follow you at some point. So if your post today was to tell me to remember to follow you just say it next time. sheesh. I'm truly sorry. I thought I had followed you. I'm a bad person...

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  10. I do this kind of thing all the time! Be it my cell phone, the house phone, my journal, you name it, I will set it down somewhere and be looking for it within 30 minutes. It’s a side effect of multi-tasker. Too much mumbo jumbo going on in our over-active brains. Little things begin to seep out the cracks.

    There’s a slave for that you know. You smear it all over the scalp to help prevent the loss of important information. Of course it tends to really screw up your hair

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  11. LOL! I am soooo forgetful. I got pregnancy brain and it never left :)

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  12. I once wrapped my cell phone in a Christmas gift. This was back in the day when a battery stayed charged for about ten minutes. Then I stood at the turnstile at the pharmacy confused as to how to exit. "Just walk through, duh," was the response from the twelve year old working behind the counter. (She looked twelve anyway). Oh well...yet I remember that the wrinkles used to be smooth places. Yikes!!

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  13. I am so glad to have made my way over here...this is HILARIOUS! I do that all of the time. I have finally had to make myself stop leaving the room to put anything away. I put everything that needs to go to another room in one spot until the room I am in is finished, then I take only the things that belong to my next room and finish that one. Somehow I always manage to end up back in the original room with yet another pile. I still can't figure that one out. It is like playing demonic Tetris!

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