Monday, February 6, 2012

Well That's Just Super....

Every year, Terry celebrated the Superbowl by working on his Jazz Hands...

Afternoon Readers,

     Welp, yesterday was the Superbowl, and, like a true woman trying to grow another human being, I showed up to eat my weight in what was available. (If you ask nicely, I'll let you have the other sandwich I hid in my bra. The whole situations starting to itch.) Besides eating, I picked up some new football knowledge I was completely unaware of. As some have informed me, I might've been watching a completely different game, but that's neither here nor there. Let's start with the commercials...

     My friend asked me this morning what I thought about the adds. "Tremendous," I said.

     "Well, which ones did you like best?"

     "I really liked the one with the little boy who kept trying to stick his head in the toilet. Although, it's hard to decide because the one with the little girl who kept trying to stick her fingers in the light locket was really good too."   

     My friend shook her head. "I didn't see either one of those."

     "Are you sure? They played it several different times. What about the one with the little boy who found the family's pet dachshund and tried to squeeze it to death, or that cute one where the little girl started screaming, "My binkie, my binkie. He got's my binkie" and then tried to hurl herself down the stairs? I tell you, those ad execs are getting preeeeetty clever."

     A quick line of questioning on her part determined that, while I thought I was watching the Superbowl, I may have been following the babies around, instead. The good news is I was still able to gain something of value. For those of you not familier with the ins and outs of football, here are just a few things I picked up yesterday:

Touchdown: When a baby falls off something and lands on its feet.

Tight end: Something I don't have anymore

Corner: Where naughty children go

Punt: What you want to do with people who are disobedient, but can't...

Blitz: The ice cream you didn't see headed for your eyeballs.


Quarterback: What you scream at a baby, while trying to fish the object from the back of its gullet.

Interception: The act of someone else offering to watch your kids while you eat a cracker.

End Zone: A crib

Sack: Where I cried myself to sleep last night

Anyone else watch the Superbowl?

Until Next Time, Readers!