|"But you don't even know how to play chess." ..."I realize that, but if I fake it, maybe my kids will stop asking for things."|
You know what I love about spring in Kansas? Nothing. Because it's never coming. That's right, people. We're knocking on May's door, and it's still freezing, which means the children and I are in close quarters.
Staring at each other.
Ok, I'm going to back up and erase "staring." That word implies things are quiet and people are stationary. Not so. The fact is, the last seven months of winter have taught me that I'm not just a mother. Blindsided, I have also found restaurant-style employment.
Excuse me, one of the guests has demanded her hands washed and dried. Hold please.
Ok, I'm back. The good news is I was complimented by two of the patrons, on the PB and Js made from hamburgers buns they were served before this posting. The bad news is I have to go change this morning's viewing from Beauty and the Beast to Curious George.
So, as I was saying, the feeling of being a waitress is pretty heavy right now. I scratched down a few examples for you guys, which I will get to as soon as I get someone a drink of water. It could take a while because it's always "This isn't my glass" this, and "But this one doesn't have the right character on it," that.
That's too much water.
That's not enough water.
I wanted milk.
If I were the type of person who goes insane, I tell ya, I would. But the voices said to just cool it, so I guess I'll get back to telling you all about this waitress thing I'm going through.
Right. Examples. I have them. Because I write things down like a good writer, when I remember. And I'll go grab that note pad in a minute. The baby just ordered a bottle. Which is actually really convenient because his room is on the way to the bathroom, where I need to go ...but not before I get the kids some crayons and paper.
Ok, they need another drink, so I'll run by the kitchen, grab the drinks, crayons, paper and make a bottle. Someone just mentioned the restaurant's bathroom is out of toilet paper, which is good because I was going to swing by there on the way to the baby's room. I'm just not sure how I'm going to hug everyone at the same time.
Two orders for hugs and new one for snacks just came in. I guess those examples I had for you all will just have to wait.
After this shift's over, I'm going to go walk around outside and look for spring. Maybe it needs a bottle and a hug.
Until Next Time, Readers!