Monday, July 15, 2013

I Want To Give You Things For My Birthday


Morning Readers,

I may or may not be turning 29 today. But that's not the point. The point is I just got the sweetest call from Husband.

"Happy birthday, babe!"

"Thanks!"

"Will you remember to take out the trash? Because it's trash day."

Nope, I guess that's not the point either.

Oh yes, I remember....

Picture yourself poolside, or lounging on the beach. It's nice, right? But it could be better. What you need are some great books to make you laugh, and some seriously stylish summer accessories. Well, we have you covered. First up, we're giving away six (count 'em, SIX) funny books that you probably already own because you have such great taste. But if, by chance, you've been busy reading the dictionary cover to cover or you tried to buy these and Amazon was all like, "Sorry, too slow, sucker. Sold out!" today's your lucky day!
At Least My Belly Hides My Cankles
At Least My Belly Hides My Cankles: Mostly-True Tales of an Impending Miracle is the debut novel of the amazing Paige Kellerman, of There's More Where That Came From. In it, she props her cankles up on the coffee table of your heart and tells the tale of her pregnancy with twins, from the announcement of the pregnancy test results to the experience of being hoisted awkwardly (is there any other way?) onto the delivery table. You'll be able to relate to every word, and Paige's unique storytelling style will keep you laughing, guaranteed.
Abby Still Has Issues
Abby Still Has Issues is the second book by Abby Heugel of the award-winning blog, Abby Has Issues. It features a ton of laugh-out-loud essays that could only be plucked from that wonderfully neurotic head full of issues we all love so well. Laugh along as she admits to being smelly (it's not what you think), converses with her pants, and reveals why other countries hate us (hint: it's our eyelashes). Intrigued? YOU SHOULD BE. Because it's full of awesome.
I Just Want To Pee Alone
I Just Want To Pee Alone, a hilarious collection of hilarious essays about motherhood by 37 hilarious mothers, covers every parenting topic from planning for your baby, to being driven insane by your children, to... wait, are there other parenting topics? Yes, don't be silly, of course there are. There's something for everyone in this #1 best selling humor anthology which, I don't mind saying, at one point ranked ahead of Tina Fey's Bossypants - a fact that many of the co-authors plan to have engraved on their tombstones.
Ketchup is a Vegetable: And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves by Robin O'Bryant of Robin's Chicks is full of funny stories about motherhood, sex talks, the terror of car trips, and all those eye-roll inducing, forehead-vein popping, laugh-out-loud things that bond parents together under the flag of Oh Thank Heavens, It Isn't Just Me.
Also win a copy of Adrian Kulp's hilarious book Dad or Alive: Confessions of an Unexpected Stay-at-Home Dad, which is based on his popular blog DadorAlive.com. With chapters like "She's Gonna Have Daddy Issues" you know this book will be funny, relatable and just a little bit twisted (in the best possible way).
And we understand that you'll need to keep the kids occupied if you're hoping to get enough time to yourself to read a book with more than eight syllables per page. That's why we're also giving away 75 Ways To Have More Fun At Home, a fantastic e-book by Anna of My Life and Kids that's absolutely bursting with activities for your kids. These are cheap-to-free, unique, realistic ideas for things that real people could and would actually do. You don't want another summer day to go by without it!
I can say, without fear of hyperbole, that you're entire summer will be a complete waste of time if you don't read these books - so in the event that you don't win this amazing prize package, check out the links and buy your own copies. You'll be glad you did. Now, while you're enjoying these fabulous books, you want to look fabulous too, don't you? Never fear, we have that covered, too! A Girl and Her BandTo keep the hair out of your face while you're reading (or while you're serving up a wicked ace on the beach volleyball court), you'll need headbands and hair ties from A Girl and Her Band. These suckers are nonslip, moisture wicking, antimicrobial and machine washable, not to mention cute as all getout. A Girl and Her Band is a company started by regular (but fantastic) mamas who support and empower active girls, and give back to the community by donating a portion of all website sales to a different charity each month. They've generously offered up three headbands of your choosing, and they're throwing in a 5-pack of matching hair ties, too! Their company makes your heart feel as good as your hair will with this essential set of accessories. As if that weren't enough to make you look like a million bucks while you're enjoying your summer reading, you'll also get a Vera Bradley Summer Pack, which includes a Vera Bradley sarong, a small mesh tote, and a beach towel in the gorgeous Go Wild pattern.
AND, just in case we missed anything, we're throwing in a $125.00 Amazon gift card so you can treat yourself to something special (I don't know if Amazon sells fruity drinks in coconuts with little umbrellas in bulk quantities, but I'd look into that if I were you). ENOUGH ALREADY, you say! I'm interested, so how do I enter?!? To qualify: You must be able to read, or know someone who is willing to read to you, and live in the United States. Recommended: Tissues, for laughter-induced tear blotting. Large-rimmed Jackie O sunglasses for increased mysterious cool factor. A few seconds of free time here and there for reading. Required: Do the little Rafflecopter thingy. Winner will be chosen at random and notified after the giveaway closes on Sunday, July 21. If there's no response from the winner within 24 hours, another winner will be chosen and so on until I decide just to keep everything for myself. (I'm kidding, of course. OR AM I? Yes, I'm kidding.) a Rafflecopter giveaway

57 comments:

  1. I was thinking how awesome this giveaway is then I realized that I already own three of the books, including yours, of which I just purchased and finished the first chapter - hilarious! Can't wait to read more tonight when I'm in bed with no kids clamoring for my attention. When I win this (because I was able to get ALL possible entries) I promise to share the books I already own with others...maybe. And I just might be stalking you with questions about book writing in the near future - if I can get my act together. :-)

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    1. That comment made it wound like once I found out I owned three of the books that I no longer thought it was an awesome giveaway - not the case! Still awesome!

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  2. Thank you for posting the giveaway *before* I head in for my 10 hour shift at work! :) You made me very happy. Now if I can win something, even better!

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  3. Happy birthday! I'm having so much fun reading your blog and your facebook posts. My kids are older (18 & 22), but your posts snap me right back to the days when they had me laughing (so I wouldn't cry). Love, love, love it. And of course, there's that glee that someone else is going through it now - and not me.

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  4. Happy Birthday! You always brighten my day and make me laugh! :)

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  5. Happy Birthday. Now back to me; I'm going to need these giveaways as pre-reading and relaxation to my Bar Exam Study Hell. So really, you could write this off as charity. Yeah, that's it, charity. <3 Love your stuff woman, and not in an icky-awkward-conversation-kind-of-way.

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  6. Happy Birthday!!! My birthday is this week too...so yaknow...wink wink ;)

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  7. Happy birthday! So glad I found this after I've had my first round of coffee today.

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  8. The happiest of birthdays to the funniest of moms! May it be filled with good writing, better cake, and long naps.

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  9. Happy Birthday!! 29 was the best age, so good I keep repeating it :)

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  10. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. I WANT THAT VERA BRADLEY SET. I'm not one for material items, but HOLY SHIT.

    And Happy birthday!! I hope your hubby comes home and takes out the trash AND rubs your feet.

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  11. Happy Birthday!! Hope it is a terrific one!! :) As always, I love your post and of course, the idea of winning some HILARIOUS books.... ;)

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  12. Happy Birthday!! Hope it is a terrific one!! :) As always, I love your post and of course, the idea of winning some HILARIOUS books.... ;)

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  13. Happy Birthday! (Btw, don't forget to take out the trash.) Hey, my birthday is this week too! This would be an awesome present! Been wanting ALL of these books!

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  14. Happy birthday! What a fantastic giveaway!

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  15. Happy Birthday! I am so excited to have the opportunity to win all these great prizes! Thank You.

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  16. To COLLEEN: (Blogger ignored my efforts to "reply".) Give yourself a little leeway. I was born 78 years ago & I'm VERY happy being 36!!

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PAIGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  17. I'm going to win. Just saying. Although I will have to re-gift the books. Also. Did I mention I'm winning?

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  18. Happy happy birthday.

    This is a great giveaway! :)

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  19. Happy birthday! Also, I want all the things. I'm a twin mom too - hook me up, okay?

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  20. The only thing I love more than reading is reading a free book.
    Oh, I mean the only thing I love more than reading is spending every waking moment with my 10 month old, pulling books out of his mouth... yeah. ::cough:: that's... honest.

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  21. Happy birthday! I hope it's your best year yet!

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  22. Yay! I already have your book (Because I DO have great taste!) but I'd love to win any of the other prizes!

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  23. Can't wait to read your book! Your blog is great, so I'm thinking the book will be too. And I like to win stuff.

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  24. Hope it's an amazing birthday (once you take out the trash).

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  25. What a cool idea and wow, a lot of fun books there! And other goodies. Happy Birthday!

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  26. Happy Birthday! What an amazing gift to us!

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  27. Merry Un-Birthday (since I somehow missed this post yesterday)

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  28. All these books look so fun! Win Win Win!

    Oh yeah, And Happy Birthday!

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  29. As a mom of 5 year old twins, your book is definitely on my "must read" list. When I don't win this contest, I will be buying it right away ;)

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  30. Happy birthday! What a great giveaway!

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  31. Happy Birthday! Thank you for sharing with us!

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  32. Happy birthday to you and your cankles! Awesome giveaway! :)
    Justin Knight
    Writing Pad Dad Blog

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  33. Even if I don't win...thanks for the adds to my reading list!

    Wishing you the happiest of birthdays!

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  34. Happy, happy birthday, you youngin' you! (I'm 29 btw.) Thanks for the giveaway!

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  35. Happy birthday! I look forward to my emails with your new blog posts in them :) I am glad to see there is another awesome Mom just like me out there!

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  36. Happy birthday! I hope you have a fantastic day!

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  37. Happy day after your birthday! I can't wait to get your book!! Oh, and 29? Jealous. Big time;)
    Vicky
    http://thepursuitofnormal.blogspot.com/

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